For most people, social media is something that happened to them, and the nature of the relationship is asymmetrical.
The companies building these products spend millions weaponizing their apps to take advantage of human psychology, while social forces have made these apps ubiquitous and part of the fabric of many people’s lives.
I don’t think it’s fair to say people “let” social media control them any more than it’s fair to say someone predisposed to alcoholism “lets” alcohol control them.
This isn’t to say we don’t need to each take steps to improve our situations or unplug from social media, but I’m pointing this out because of how it relates to your earlier diagnosis that “Everyone who uses social media is a loser”, which points the finger in the wrong direction and frames the issue as a personal problem vs. a growing systemic social issue.