But the above criteria are mostly subjective, so objectivity largely doesn’t apply.

The HP ZBook G1a comes close in computing power, screen, sound and trackpad quality - but not at all in battery life: about 7 hours. It's also pretty overpriced, but discounts are common.

"comes close" in itself is a very relative concept. So how can you claim my statements are "objectively wrong"?. Depends on how close "close" is, right.

If you can provide me an example of a laptop that beats one of those categories, it's objectively wrong. In all other cases, nope.