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Explanations like that are a lot easier to understand if you can see the equivalent circuit with the parasitic components.
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Yeah

The ELI5 for decoupling capacitors is "imagine an energy storage for quick usage"

The ELI(tired EE student) is more like the explanation above

And this concept is ok for most of the 'low speed' circuits

in RF ranges, everything is a capacitor (except when you need one), everything is an inductor (except when you need one) and the intuitive explanations break down and everything looks like dark magic

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I love your reverse psychology analogy. That does make me wonder, if a cap past its SRF is an inductor, and and inductor past its SRF is a cap, why not swap caps for inductors and vice versa, put an amplifier on the end and call it a day!
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