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> Horrified at what must lurk beneath the façade

It's Ruby, which is pretty horrific but still I think there was probably something not quite right in your setup because it isn't normally that slow.

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While there are a lot of little knobs that can tweak performance, it shouldn't be slow out of the box, yet it is the number one complaint about GitLab.
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yeah we run it on a tiny setup compared to that and it's fine. In fact, impressively snappy if anything.
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