upvote
It's rude to me as well. But I think we are wrong about this.

I was in the doctor's office and a person was on the phone talking in the waiting room. I thought it was weird. But then I thought "if a person was sitting in the seat next to them and they were talking, would that be weird?"

I don't think we'd see two people talking as being weird. Why is it weird if someone is by themself speaking to someone that isn't around on the phone? If two people can speak in that place, it's not weird for someone to have a phone discussion.

Now playing music speakers or watching TikTok videos on your phone in a public place...psychotic!

reply
That’s a good observation. I think it’s where their heads are facing. Two conversationalists face each other or face the room, but talk quietly with body language that suggests they’re conversing (heads tilted, leaning.)

Someone talking on the phone but facing away from the room isn’t usually considered rude, either.

In a waiting room or train car, if you’re sitting and talking on the phone or Zoom, you’re broadcasting into the room with your posture. Your voice tends to broadcast as well with no wall or other conversant as an immediate barrier.

reply
I would consider two people talking to each other in a waiting room or on a train very rude too. If they are loud enough that the people next to them or behind them can hear the words they are saying, then it is rude of them. Of course, this is relative to how noisy the place is overall.
reply
deleted
reply
perhaps this is why you are unhappy and not the other stuff.
reply
Maybe he's just Japanese, or German.
reply
It is rude and annoying in general. But even in quiet cars it seems like many people just don't give a fuck and will simply jabber on obnoxiously without any care for anyone else.

Would be nice if people could keep their noise levels down in general.

reply
These kind of social rules are why I’m very glad that America has garbage public transit culture. Actually I am going to jabber on talking to folks during transportation events. I’m going to do it in my personal vehicle so I don’t have to deal with others crying about my behavior.

Only poor people are required to humiliate themselves by asking every tom, dick, and harry for their opinion on if their behavior is acceptable.

reply
I sincerely hope you're able to someday deal with your issues and become free from your suffering
reply
You're farting with a walkman on.
reply
Unfortunately people all over are starting to not do anything.

On a recent plane ride some old guys were watching movies on their phones on full volume. I complained and they stopped, but another guy in another row started doing it again. It gets tiring.

Last week I was on a NYC subway train to JFK Airport and there was a guy blasting some loud hip-hop/trap and a small kid playing some loud game, totally oblivious to the people on the train. After they left some older guy stepped in talking on full speaker to someone for 10 minutes.

It was quite crazy tbh, and I guess people here have already given up and start accepting it since it is tiring to police somebody new every 5 minutes and could also end in violence.

reply
The number of people blasting video on a regional flight with no internet really made me reconsider just how necessary airplane mode is. Probably an applicable case study for many other societal boundary-breaches silently spreading.
reply
I think it depends not just on culture but also on the volume of the conversation. Some people manage to have a conversation when you can barely hear them; others seem to have a conversation with everyone on the train.
reply
I don't mind people having conversations, just don't blast the volume up or put it on speaker for the whole train to hear..
reply
From my experience, (outside of the quiet car), "extremely rude" - only South Korea and Japan?
reply
Having lived in both Australia and Japan and visited SK, for me it seems like it’s rude in all those places but only in some places do almost all the people care what strangers think enough to modify their behaviour. Which is not as judgmental a statement as it sounds like, because that care, or some might call it pressure to conform, has upsides and downsides.
reply
Yeah, to clarify my comment, I think it's rude everywhere and I suspect many others generally also, but I've only experienced feeling I couldn't do it/people will absolutely stop you in SK/JP. I've been on trains all through Europe, the UK, almost all of North America and usually hear someone on the phone, but nobody ever says anything.
reply
UK, unless you are quiet about it. Though you might not notice as our reaction only tends to be in body language, or for particularly loud speakers (particularly those who are GOING INTO A TUNNEL or otherwise think shouting will help with bad reception) we might tut.
reply
It's considered rude in Belgium, at least when I commuted there by train. People would leave the wagon to take a call. Maybe it's changed in the past few years. There were also signs that it's prohibited to call in the trains.
reply
Leave the wagon to where? Like get off the train? The trains are all wagon, no?
reply
There's usually some space between train coaches (I think it's called a gangway?) or at the end of a coach (a vestibule) that is separated from the seats area by doors on both sides. You can take your call there.
reply
Gotcha. On the trains I'm used to (Amtrak, NYC subway) spaces between cars are either nonexistent, or extremely dangerous.
reply
In London, subway cars are either completely separated and you can't travel between them, or it's just one long continuous tube, there are no vestibules. You don't get much signal underground either way, so it's rare to see people on a call.

Most trains however have a space [0] at the end of each car where you enter and exit. That space can also have a toilet, bike storage, various (locked) train controls, sometimes even a few seats [1] where you can sit if your call will be a while.

0: https://www.cornwallrailwaysociety.org.uk/uploads/7/6/8/3/76...

1: https://www.modernrailways.com/sites/modernrailways/files/im...

reply
Amtrak trains have vestibules when I take them.
reply
Leave the department*, the parts where people get on/off trains are closed off from the seats. There's also some gangway connections which have doors between the wagons.
reply
i’m in the US, if you took a call for more than a few mins a busy metro car I’d tell you to knock it off
reply
People talk on the phone all the time on every US metro I’ve tried. Seems fine if they’re not on speaker or raising their voice
reply
My dad speaks loudly on speakerphone phones in restaurants and public spaces daily because he's a rude old asshole.

No one beside myself has ever told him to stop because I think being old gives one a bit of a 'get out of jail free card ' with regard to social behaviors.

I would love for you or someone like you to happen upon him and tell him to knock it off, but alas that seems fleetingly rare.

reply
[dead]
reply
Unfortunately, these days, most of us won't do that because there is a high likelihood it could incite violence.
reply
and inciting violence is against the law.
reply
UK included.
reply