The key thing here is to be able to discern between real and manipulated input information. For this, gut feeling usually works best: it spots that whiny, attention-insisting, importance-seeking, fear-inducing tone of a manipulator, but oftentimes the higher-level nervous system of the brain suppresses that signal (e.g. "How can a well-educated and charismatic person feel a bit off and responsibility-lacking sometimes? It cannot be right, so it must be something with my interpretation of reality. I bet they have the best intentions.")
An even better approach may be not to search for feedback at all, unless it's shared naturally without any strings attached.
I enjoyed all the papers I read on my graduate classes that bordered on "art" whereas now they seem to be obsessed with performance only.