Let he who hasn't cheated on his first wife to get with his second wife to cheat on his second wife to get with his 'genius visa' third wife cast the first stone! Seriously, people, everyone does it!

My question about Melanoma - since Grump is effectively a slow moving cripple, who keeps giving her those black eyes? Eric? The other one? Or is Grump himself just directing his goons to beat her in some pathetic attempt to get it up again?