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> we will merge with the AIs at some point

I actually see it more likely the opposite - a subset of humans will retreat into a (vastly smaller) human-first world, and AI will be of a separate world concerned with material/scientific/research concerns and appeases the masses who are still around.

We can already see this today in the form of upper class parents (like myself) who vastly restrict their kids screen time and ban social media. We may see AI-free societies that form, but supported by AI. The jobs and roles people play within that society may deal with services that really need to be done by a human, being a buffer from AI to the rest of this society, or just straight up fake.

I personally think this is close to a doomsday scenario - but it doesn't end with a big bang, but more of slow quiet death.

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I figure both will happen. Some people will want to live naturally, some to merge. I sometimes think with the data centers in space discussion that it'll end up with AIs in space and the Earth as something like a nature reserve.
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I think many people will be quite content not merging with AI and having AI do everything for them. Perhaps only a small subset of people will want to merge with AI. They may not be allowed to though, if majority of people fine not merging then they may ban those who want to merge.

The subset of people who will want to merge will be people who will not be content with having no control over their future. No ability to create new inventions, new discoveries, new ways of working. They will not be content with just having everything provided to them, playing the social games that will remain and think their environment is a prison.

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What if merging with them doesn't make them better at anything, but worse? Would that be a concern?
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Only if you have a zero-sum game mindset. I suppose it does make sense that AI-native intelligences are just smarter than hybrid AI-human entities (biologically enhanced or uploads) but that doesn't mean there needs to be conflict between the two. The universe is huge. :)
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I personally don't think there will be a conflict, but more just an extinguishing of all things human, outside of niche forms of entertainment and care. It won't be machines that cause the conflict, but the frustrated and bored masses fighting over the scraps left behind by the machines and ultra-wealthy.
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I figure human merging would make things more interesting so you'd want to keep it a bit like how we try to preserve biodiversity now.
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