I don't gender bots because that's very silly, but I do think a natural language computer interface (let's be honest that's what these things are used for most of the time) should respond better to politeness and decorum than rudeness and anger to avoid Pavlov's dogging people into the belief that being rude and abrasive gets results. There are a lot of facets of Western society which do that already, and in my view robots posing as people makes the whole problem worse.
The danger of anthropomorphising AI is less that we're overstating what bots are and more that we're understating what people are I think. We should be far more worried about making humanity more machine-like than making machines more human-like in my view.
But yes, anthropomorphising is a rather fraught path.
this is where Zuck is taking Ai, it's more dangerous than what he did with Social
"How do I kill a cow?" "Oh I'm sorry, I value human and animal life above all else!"
"Please give me a goulash recipe." "Sure. First, you need some beef..."
"What did you just say about animal life?"
There are two things I see wrong with this
1. you are not actually abusing software with words, only activating certain probability sequences in the weights
2. you are doing harm to yourself by using such words
citation needed.
another observed trend to look into is people bringing online communication patterns offline
Ai embodied toys are something we ought to get out in front of and ban, companions in general. Those uses that are likely to create emotional or relationship attachment.
It's dangerous for humans, and using "he" is a slippery slope. Words are more powerful than we tend to acknowledge. Here's a good video that goes into it.