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by tombert19 hours ago |
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upvoteby pavel_lishin18 hours ago|
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I'm fine sharing (some) things about myself with coworkers, but I'm also in a position where if someone says, "So you can be our on-call guy for on-prem servers?" I can say "Absolutely not without a really big fucking raise, and I am not kidding, if you call me at 3am to come in, I will hang up on you."
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upvoteby callc18 hours ago|
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If everyone had a spine like you we’d all be much better off for it
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upvoteby viklove11 hours ago|
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Our masters keep us desperate so we can't
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upvoteby eminence3216 hours ago|
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There's only two answers to the question "can you be our on-call guy" which are:

* No

* Only if I get on-call pay

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upvoteby alt22718 hours ago|
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The problem here is not divulging info about yourself, its not being able to say no to work. I will happily draw a line where my responsiblities end and if anybody asks me to go over that I will ask for a role review. Too many people get walked over at work, stand up for yourself and say no!
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upvoteby tombert18 hours ago|
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I don't think I disagree with that at all.

Still, I do think there's merit in keeping your personal life to yourself and not telling your coworkers more than they need to know. I'm not saying you should be stoic or a dick or anything; by all means engage in conversations and be nice. I'm just saying that it's important to have boundaries.

I tend to be someone who overshares a lot (hence my enormous word count on Hacker News), so I just try and keep this in mind.

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upvoteby alt22718 hours ago|
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Fair response. I guess it also depends on the working environment, the type of person you are, and whether your coworkers are more or less like you as a person etc.
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upvoteby mystifyingpoi16 hours ago|
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Exactly on point. Don't share anything that's not relevant to the job. In one of the previous jobs, I was coerced into doing a deployment to prod every 2 weeks at Friday 10 pm, since my boss knew I was single and not into partying or meeting with friends. Had I known better, I'd maybe even lie about my life and tell him to get lost.
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upvoteby Paracompact11 hours ago|
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Becoming a surface level/"vapid" work automaton would be a heavy price for to pay, perhaps not for you personally, but for me and I imagine many others. So, I'm not sure your example would lead me to the conclusion of your behavior. You mention being called at 3am as one incident that didn't mean much to you at the time and didn't become a pattern of exploitation, so what was really lost?

Maybe I'm lucky. I've so far not had to endure a job for which I was underpaid and expected to meet and exceed every contractual obligation placed on me.

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upvoteby lukan19 hours ago|
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I've learned that life is what you make of it. If you let yourself be used - others will use you. But if you showed your worth, but also showed others that you know your worth - things are different.

(otherwise where I work, I also avoid talking about politics for instance, but this is a different theme)

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upvoteby tombert19 hours ago|
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I don't really talk about politics at work either, but that's broadly because I live in a very progressive area where pretty much everyone has the same opinions that I do so it would be a pretty boring echo chamber.
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upvoteby lukan18 hours ago|
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Hehe, that got me laughing a lot.

A) because picturing at my current work place everybody learning of all my opinions at once and the resulting drama

B) I am in progressive spaces quite often, but they are far from an echo chamber with everyone having the same opinions either ..

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