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The description of the interview seems like it was explicitly non-technical, though.
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Yep. This is definitely an OP-is-autistic problem, or is perhaps inexperienced. Not an interviewer problem. Keep it professional. If an interviewer asks a personal question then you simply refuse to answer (politely), or steer it back towards a professional context. If they persist then you end the interview.
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"definitely an OP-is-autistic problem" is an absurd claim to make about an internet stranger, and violates comment guidelines https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html.
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Well, as someone with autism myself it's relatively easy to spot others, and given the information provided in the post I'd say chances are high. Not sure what rule you're referring to, it looks fine to me - autism is a super power, not a slur.
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I don't agree. While yes, it's definitely possible the interviewee handled it poorly, I have seen enough poorly conducted interviews to say it's just as likely the interviewer was the problem.

My best guess is that as a mental health startup geared toward expanding access to therapy services, they were fishing for candidates who had some kind of experience with the industry, or who could prove their fealty to the mission. For example: "After grieving the loss of my brother, I tried to obtain counseling services. But my private insurance didn't cover that, and when I looked for supplemental insurance, I was stuck in a byzantine maze of options. There was no centralized and easy way to see what might be covered, and for what cost; all of it was hidden behind sales reps you had to contact over the phone. That's when I came to understand the value of the kind of service ACMECORP is looking to introduce into the market."

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From the details I read in the post you are almost certainly wrong, not to mention being reallying condescending.

The interviewer has control over the room. They steer the conversation. They could have stopped this at any point. Instead they encouraged OP to go deeper for 90 minutes.

That wasn't OP misunderstanding a question, that was an interviewer enjoying the power trip.

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Should OP take their mom next time to shut things down for them? You don't have to do what others ask you, you know.
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It might be cultural as well; I'm Polish and living in UK made me change my habits of answering "How are you?" questions. Same with Dutch from my experience - there are cultures where people say what's on their mind without the "I'm fine, how are you" bullshit.

To be fair though, drama-dumping goes beyond that

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How do Poles answer "how are you?" differently to Brits?
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Brits will either say "Fine, thanks" or not respond at all. Poles will tell you that yesterday they went to visit their relatives, and now they're tired, or that their cat is sick, or that they having problems with something.

It's a difference between "asking when you don't care about response" vs "asking because you genuinely want to know how the other person is"

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In the UK, a perfectly valid answer to "How are you?" is "How are you?"
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Yes :D

In Poland you would just say Hej! = I acknowledge you being there but I don't want to chat. But again, back to the point I was trying to make - the intent behind these sort of questions (and answers) can be cultural

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I've had that before. I asked a woman to walk me through her career (I told her I've obviously seen the profile before, but I'd love to hear the elevator pitch directly from her) and she started off by saying,"Well, you need to know that I was raised in a cult."

And, yeah, I feel bad for her. But also: time and place.

I passed on her because she didn't have the technical skills, but that was definitely a case of the setting not being right.

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“He kept talking about dead babies, failed relationships and the time he cheated in an exam in grade five. Fifteen minutes in and I wondered not whether I would hire him, but if he would kill me and wear my skin if I didn’t. Or did. Little difference.”
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you think that's what it was? The people with 100% of the power in this situation did everything 100% correct and you're not victim-blaming at all?
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It was a textbook example of the double contingency of communication¹. In communications it doesn't only matter what each side is objectively saying. It matters what the other side expects them to hear. And that goes both ways.

In this case the interviewer asked these questions to get to know the candidate in a professional setting, so they expected a diplomatic or professional answer. The candidate however misjudged the interviewer intention behind the questions, took them literally and answered them truthfully. Neither of these people is technically sporting a wrong position, yet the communication broke down.

That being said, the idea that you can choose not to talk about certain things is pretty basal when it comes to communications. If you have a trauma nobody can force you to talk about it and you should also not talk to everybody and their dog about it (and I know people who constantly do this and have a tendency to regret it afterwards). It costs you nothing to say that you can't think of any specific day, or talk about a day where a old boss at a shitty student job abused you, to frame it in work terms. To talk strategically or diplomatically is a skill that is needed in many positions. And that candidate displayed a total lack of that ability.

That being said I am not particularly fond of that type of question myself. Both as an the person carrying out an interview and the person going to one. I am more interested to see how a person tackles certain situations than to have them tell me stories about it.

¹: see https://www.orientation-philosophy.com/glossary/double-conti...

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This interview lasted over an hour. If he was answering wrong they should have said something.
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> In this case the interviewer asked these questions to get to know the candidate in a professional setting, so they expected a diplomatic or professional answer

And there is no bias in this assumption whatsoever?

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No. Reread the post. This interview was specifically explained as a non-technical, cultural-fit talk, and the interviewer "gave an impression of this being a safe space". That means they said something specific to hint that this is the case.

Don't blame the poor guy who was subjected to this. You're projecting your understanding of what is normal for the interviewer and assuming that the particular interviewer didn't cross any of the lines you wouldn't. Unless you are the interviewer or know their side of the story, there is literally nothing in the post that would suggest your reading is correct.

A simpler explanation: the interviewer was an amateur psychologist with little experience in either interviewing or therapy. They asked "interesting questions," then were overwhelmed by answers they hadn't expected and couldn't gracefully handle. That's it. Please, unless you know more about that particular instance, don't reflexively blame the candidate for what looks like a series of errors on the interviewer's part.

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"Victim blaming" because of a bad interview. lolwut
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