(No child is deserving of being mistreated but that's a whole other bag of worms)
But some regions/cultures are lagging (but catching up fast) as per my experience living in 5 states across 3 countries spanning two very different continents.
So, your life is sprinkled with unhelpful people that mean well but think you're just not listening to them.
And you yourself think, your too dumb or lazy or whatever to get things done consistently.
The you find out it's ADHD and you learn different methods to get things done. Which is nice.
But it's also very sad if that happens years after childhood. Because you realise, you might had a more successful life if you knew earlier
YMMV, maybe other individuals need confirmation/closure on the topic in their lives to help them move onto the next chapter? Knowledge is power.
(Post-comment reflection: this is needed in a lot of other aspects in life, why not here as well?)
The only way it does make sense is if you think the consequences should be different because some doctor give it a name. But then you say nobody should have been treated that way regardless of the diagnoses. If the diagnoses doesn't matter why does it matter?
As someone who definitely has dealt with all this for my entire life I've found it much easier to just focus on behavior and consequences and alternatives. Trying to place it all in a moral/medical framework is a black hole. If your actions hurt others or otherwise have negative results you have to address that.
Learning that you were not, in fact, a horrible and wicked child that your parents had to endure is life changing.
It's like being forced to write with your left hand the entire life, and suddenly you realize that you are right handed, and it's ok to be right handed too...
For me it was very different. Once I considered possible audhd, and knew what my triggers are and what is expected or not, my life is a lot easier and happier. I don't have to pretend anymore, and I no longer feel bad for being myself.
I am ok sitting in a corner in a crowded social environment and not feel weird about it. Even more, I meet more people who feel the same, so it leads to better relationships and more easy-going conversations, instead of forcing myself to be social for example.
ADHD is often an executive function disorder. As a manager, have you offered them an accommodation?
Lots of “I” statements from you and not a whole lot of understanding.
Yes, and that wasn't my point. Except for one case who was definitely abusing the situation, I never once revealed that my inner monologue was pointing out that I have the same issues they do but I don't use it as an excuse for not getting my work done.
Maybe it's not just a label as your are painting it, but rather a complex situation over ones entire life with many layers, which cannot be easily understood in a short time (and much less in a manager-employee conversation).
I suppose that this is a clear case for the commonly used acronym here on Hackernews: YMMV (your mileage may vary (or the other that I forgot)).
Maybe you forgot that despite us being all human, part of the same species, living on the same planet: no individuals will have the exact same life, same thought process, same ability to deal, cope or handle adversity or environmental factors.
It feels wrong to read you saying that you are comparing yourself to others in such a manner...
I sincerely suggest that you try to be understanding of your reports instead of being mildly inconvenienced by their problems and labeling them negatively as you have suggested here.
People leave jobs because of bad management. Be better.
And also pay attention to how I said I kept those thoughts to myself. I recognize that the younger generations seem to feel it's all quite alright, and I handle it appropriately in the contemporary style.
Plus, isn’t this comment thread under a post regarding a link between ADHD and complex trauma? Complex trauma is… complex. I doubt that you share the same circumstances that resulted in the diagnosis that you and your reports both share.
This worries me.
Also, what's so noble about hiding own struggles?
And also, why shouldn't I be relieved when I understand a big factor in my struggles?
This is a very confusing comment.
Would a valid example of this be the ADHD tag on twitch streamer channels?
I'm sure it's very fun for everyone abusing adderall to get a doctor to believe their story (after all, they barely understand these conditions themselves), but it's a difficult life to have these conditions. Lot of what I hear described by the people self diagnosed or have a more "modern" (I'll just put it this way) diagnosis just sound like garden variety trauma due to less than tactful parents.
Yes. But when you don't know what it is you may start to believe that it's just you being lazy, stupid, slow, difficult, etc. Especially when everyone around you including teachers use these labels and you literally have no other information to base your views on. A mix of living with that for decades and being unable to know how life feels for other people can make you gaslight yourself very thoroughly.
A diagnosis is an acknowledgment of an authority on the subject that you are in fact not crazy and don't have to blame everything that happened on yourself.
> Leaving the reaction for the diagnosed to be mostly nothing in that they already know
I am glad for everyone who experienced it like that, but that's not a reason to diminish the significant effect for many others.
I should add, even when I was in grade school it was discussed for me to get evaluated. But that was far enough back that it was just "hyperactivity" & before people started talking in terms of ADD, ADHD, and subtypes, and I didn't match the criteria back then. So it wasn't like it was a big surprise decades later when revised criteria started matching my phenotype